…the movie, not the holiday.
So my wife broke into our netflix queue last week and bumped the Ashton Kutcher opus Valentine’s Day to the top so that we would have it in time to “enjoy” by Saturday. For the uninitiated, it is like Love Actually (and you cannot understand how difficult it was for me to write that; Valentine’s Day is a movie like Love Actually in the same manner that I am a basketball player like LeBron James) but basically a bunch of seemingly disperate characters shockingly become inter-locked by the end.
I am, more or less, playing with my phone and looking up exclusively when there is a Jessica on the screen (Alba, Biel (alphabetically)). But my wife is trying to piece it together like we are watching an M. Night Shyamalan puzzle that she is trying to solve; guessing how each piece fits with another. Then we have this exchange:
Her: So they’ll end up together.
Me: What? Who?
Her: Ashton and Ben Affleck’s wife.
Me: Aren’t they brother and sister?
Her: I don’t think so.
Me: I’m pretty sure they are.
Her: Well, that would be interesting.
Turns out she was right. On all counts. They weren’t brother and sister. They did end up together. And that would have been interesting. I mean, as it stands it is an incredibly weightless bit of pop fluff but to add the brother-sister element makes it feel like you’re reading a John Irving novel. I’m not saying that I endorse this tact, I’m just saying that at least it would make for a more interesting film.
Can’t wait for New Years Eve!